30 Days of Thankful: Day 4

Today I am thankful for our unborn baby.

Arriving April 12th-ish, 2013

We will find out whether it is a girl or boy in just a few short weeks. I am already so in love with this tiny little human that I haven't even met. I know whether it is a boy or a girl that it is a miracle and blessing from God. I am so anxious about mothering a newborn and a toddler simultaneously, but am constantly reminded of God's grace and provision -- He will provide if I will allow Him to.

I always knew I wanted to be a mother, but motherhood has been such a surprising journey for me thus far. I don't think I ever realized how important it was to me until I became a mother. I would never in a million years have guessed that being a stay-at-home mom was a desire that God would place in my heart or lead me to. I had always planned to work and mother. I am so thankful that it is His plans that always win out in the end if/when we listen/act according to His will.

I have been so blessed by Claire and I can only imagine the amount of joy this new baby will bring into our lives. I am thrilled that Claire will have a play-mate, friend, and confidant. Now if only the Lord will help me to facilitate a strong, loving bond between the two. I look forward to witnessing and being a part of their interactions. I pray daily that they will have the kind of sibling relationship that I was so fortunate to have with my own brother and sister.

I am so excited about the next chapter of our lives as a family of four and I look forward to all of the changes this new baby will bring.

30 Days of Thankful: Day 3

Today I am thankful for my husband.

 

We have been married for over five years. In fact last month we celebrated our 2,000th day (according to my mathematically inclined husband) of marriage. I love this man for all the things he is that I am not: patient, generous (with his time, money, etc), laid back, and mathematically inclined. ;-)

He is such a wonderful husband - not that we don't ever disagree or have rocky moments/days - but I never doubt that he was God's perfect gift to me. I am not saying that Jared is perfect (he is a fallen man), but he is perfect for me. We are a nice compliment to one another.

Also he is just about the best daddy ever there was. He is so sweet with Claire. I love watching him love his daughter. It is a sight to behold. Love practically spills out of him. He is so patient and gentle.

The sacrifices he makes for his family amaze me everyday. It is because of his hard work and dedication that I get to stay home with our daughter and the new addition that is on the way. I love him so much...even when I don't like him very much. And I know he loves me as I am - flaws and all.

And these are just a few of the reasons that I am thankful for my husband Jared today.

30 Days of Thankful: Day 2

Today I am thankful for my amazing, beautiful, intelligent little girl; Claire Marie.

I cannot believe that in less than three months she is going to be two. She is such a blessing to me and our family. Staying home with Claire has been an amazing adventure and I am so thankful for this time with her. I am learning so much about myself as a person and as a mother from spending time with her.

I am constantly in awe of how smart she is and how quickly she is growing and changing. There are definitely good days and bad, easy days and hard, but I wouldn't trade any of it. I know that each day I get to spend with her is an amazing blessing from God. I cannot believe that He chose me to be her mother.

 

I look forward to all of the milestones that I am going to get to see her reach and achieve. I don't know how much time any person has, but I know that I am going to cherish every moment that I am given to spend with my incredible first-born daughter. 

30 Days of Thankful: Day 1

Today I am thankful for my grandmother.

Thanksgiving 2011

A few weeks ago she decided that it was time to move in with my parents. I am not sure exactly what her reasoning for the move was, other than just feeling overwhelmed by keeping up with her apartment on her own, but it was by the grace of God that it happened when it did. Less than a week after the official move in she started to become very confused and forgetful. So much so that she did not remember close family members' names or even recognize her own handwriting.

I thought that the pregnancy hormones were causing me to be super emotional and weepy about the situation, but as it turns out my younger (and not pregnant) sister was feeling the same way, so we spent lots of time talking on the phone and crying to each other. I mean my grandma was about to be 90--we had to expect that her health/mental faculties would start to diminish, but the rate at which it all happened was so fast and scary.

Luckily my mom took my grandma to the doctor and they figured out that her blood sugar had sky rocketed. My grandma had to spend a few days in the hospital while they brought her sugar levels down, but then she was back home and almost as good as new. This was the best news I could have imagined. I know this was pregnancy hormones, but I just cried and thanked Jesus that she was going to be with us a while longer.

Grandma at her 90th birthday - Oct 2012 - (post hospital stay)

You can tell that she is getting more and more forgetful as she ages, but she is still pretty with it for a 90-year-old. And she is a spitfire. I love my grandma and I am SO thankful that she is with us and in relatively good health.

Expectations

As a blogger I have set certain expectations for myself. Try to blog at least once a week. Only write posts that at least one other person would be interested in reading -- even if it is only one of Claire's grandmothers. I have really blown it the last few weeks. In fact, it has been over a month since my last blog post.  I feel like a blog slacker. I have had plenty to write about, but I either a) haven't felt well enough, b) had the energy or time, c) been able to share the news yet. So in order to somewhat make up for my blog hiatus, here are some of the recent goings on in our world:

First things first: My sister got engaged to her boyfriend. I am SO excited about her wedding and welcoming a new brother-in-law to the family. I really like the guy, so that makes it all the better.

Second, Claire got her first ever bloody lip the other day. It was so sad. She was climbing (which she doe s a lot of lately, ugh!) and got caught in a bad position. She ended up face planting on the tile floor and bit right through her lip. Poor girl. It was pretty bloody and she was really upset about it. I kept trying to figure out how to ice it and keep it from puffing up too much, but Claire would have nothing to do with the ice. Then I remembered that we had some popsicles. After her popsicle Claire didn't even notice her lip the rest of the day. Phew!


Third, (maybe I should have led with this) the husband and I are expecting our second baby. The booger is due April 2013. We are really excited and cannot wait to meet this new member of our family. I have been sick as a dog...(again)...the same thing happened when I was pregnant with Claire. Thus, my explanation for why I have been such a lazy blogger.

I am about 12 weeks along as of the date of this post. We have already had our first ob appointment and everything appears to be going well. (Other than the nausea and vomiting of course--although I guess even that can be a sign that things are good). I am nearing the end of the first trimester and praying fervently that means a break from the extreme fatigue and sickness. Luckily Claire takes a good afternoon nap and mommy has been regularly taking one as well during that time. I don't know what I would do without nap time. : ) Jared and I are so thankful and feel so blessed to be welcoming Allen baby #2.

I should probably also tell you about our trip to St. Louis for the Correll-Etges wedding/zoo, but I will save that and hopefully write a separate post (with pics) for that trip.

Dickerson Park Zoo

A few months ago, the hubby had a week of training in Springfield, MO. All of the training was on the computer, so why he had to go all the way to Missouri for it I still do not quite comprehend. That really is not the point of this post though.

Since I am staying at home with Claire we decided to tag along for the ride. I "Googled" some fun things to do while we were there and found a really long list of fun activities for Claire and I. In fact I posted about our trip after we returned home (Springfield, MO).

 

 One of the fun things Claire and I did was go to the Dickerson Park Zoo. It is a smaller zoo, but it is so neat. It has a lot of opportunities for animal contact for the littles.

Jared is kind of an animal lover (which is one reason we ended up with two dogs and two cats--I might have been the other reason) and he was so sad that he had to work while we enjoyed the zoo. It was so sad to see him pout over not getting to go to the zoo that I promised him we would return some weekend so that he could see it with Claire too.

Thus our Saturday adventure to Springfield and the Dickerson Park Zoo. The zoo is really more fun in the morning, so we got up REALLY early and made it all the way to Springfield in time for the zoo opening. In fact they were just opening the gates when we pulled up and parked.

Claire got to see a hippopotamus (she loves to say "happo") and lots of snakes, frogs, and turtles. She saw a deer, she fed the giraffes, and watched the elephants get a bath. She fed some goats and even a donkey; although the donkey did mistake some of Claire's fingers for a tasty treat--which was a pretty scary parent moment--but she lived to feed again (although we avoided the donkey from that point forward).

 There was a bald eagle, and a red fox, some really lazy lions, cheetahs and tigers. (Why are all the big cats so lazy?). We saw a couple of black bears chasing each other and bug-tussling (as my mother would say). We also saw some otters, wolves, and other assorted animals.

My all-time favorite thing about the Dickerson Park Zoo is the giraffe deck. They sell these wafers and the giraffes all come over, stick out their extremely long tongues, and take the wafers right out of your hands. Claire thought this was pretty great and so did her daddy.

I think Jared really enjoyed watching the bears. And of course we made a pit-stop at the playground so Claire could go down the slide about twenty times. Thank goodness there were no swings, or we would have been there for another hour.

All in all it was a really great day. I don't know how many times we would be willing to spend more of a day driving than actually being at our destination, but I am still glad we kept our promise to daddy and let him take Claire to the zoo.

People.

Sometimes I don't understand people. People (me, I, we, and they) are selfish, controlling, hateful, mean, insincere, forgetful,  passive aggressive, and the list just goes on and on.

There are days when I have to constantly remind myself that people (me, I, we, and they) can also be kind, good, helpful, loving, selfless, loyal, and generous too. And that the good qualities can go on and on as well.

The thing is that life is hard. And every person is dealing with it in the best way they now how. Who knows what a person is struggling with/rejoicing over at any given moment that they might cross your path. I have to remember that we are a flawed and fallen people. Each person (myself included) deserves the benefit of the doubt in most cases.

I have been really struggling with people lately. Especially with people that I thought loved and cherished me (and my circumstances) unconditionally. It is just really hard for me to wrap my brain around the fact that close friends and family are going to be the people that disappoint and let me down the most/hardest.

These are some verses that God has given me in recent weeks and they have been giving me a great deal of comfort and peace. (I hope they can/will do the same for you.)

John 16:33 (NASB), "These things I have spoken to you, so that in ME you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world."

Romans 8:18 (NASB), "For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us."

Romans 8:26 (NASB), "In the same way that the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words."

Ephesians 3:20-21 (NASB), "Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen."

Ephesians 4:32 (NASB), "Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you."

I am not a perfect person and I never will be. Nobody on this earth is perfect or ever will be, but God is perfect. So I am striving to seek Him daily, so that what I fill myself up with might spill out of me onto others.