This is a letter I wrote to my third baby on the morning of her birth (and then never got around to posting). I was induced at 40 weeks and 4 days. Baby girl was born about four and half hours after the start of my pitocin drip. Once things got started she came fast and furious. I had decided with my third baby that I wanted to labor without the aide of an epidural - I had little hope of a completely natural birth because I had to be induced in both of my previous pregnancies. My decision is not a decision that I regret, but I would also probably not repeat it. Natural labor is a wonderful, beautiful thing. However, in my humble opinion, if you have to/choose to be induced and they give you pitocin - just get an epidural! ;-) Baby girl number three was my biggest baby at 8lbs 14oz. She is a delight and I love her to the moon and back, but I didn't always feel those feelings for her.
Baby,
You are coming today. It has been a long, trying, exhausting pregnancy. You have made me sicker than any of my other babies. You have made me lose more sleep than any of my other babies. You have been hard work to grow. You have also been the most laid back baby in the womb - a trait I hope you maintain outside.
I have had to learn to love you during this pregnancy. I have had to muster excitement for you. I have had to grieve the fact that I will probably never have a boy, a son. It was a long, hard journey - physically, emotionally, spiritually - but here we are at the end of it and I love you. I am excited about you. And I cannot wait to meet you. Come soon, baby girl. Come healthy, baby girl. We are anxiously awaiting your arrival. You have some very excited big sisters waiting too. <3
Love,
Mommy
So now, today, six months (and five days) after you were born this is what I have to say to you:
My third girl. My last baby, or final baby as your daddy likes to call you. My laid back, go with the flow, smiley, happy baby. How you have rocked and changed my world. You are a wonderful, amazing baby. I can't imagine a better natured baby. Does that mean you are always easy? Always good? Never challenging? Of course not.
It has been six months since you were born and this is the longest I have gone with so little sleep. You have yet to sleep "through the night," but I know you'll get there...someday. I do hope, for the sake of my sanity, that it happens sooner rather than later. We're working on it though. And I am so glad to be your mother regardless of how little sleep I get because you wake up hungry at 1 and 3 and 5 in the morning.
Thank you for continuing being so laid back. Thank you for your sweet smiles, adorable coos, and soft gurgles. Thank you for your squeals of delight. Thank you for your fascination with all the things in the world you can lay your eyes and or hands on. Thank you for the love in your eyes you already show for your sisters.
And when you are older and become a willful toddler, or challenging teen, or both of these, or none of these I am going to look back on this post and remember that you were my easiest baby (despite the sleep issues). I am going to remember that you reminded me how much I love to be a mother. I am going to remember that God has blessed me richly indeed with the life of each of my children. I am going to remember that you are a treasure and that I love you no matter what.
I am so thankful for who God made you. I am so grateful that He chose me as your mother. I hope and pray that I am the mother He wants me to be to you (and your sisters). And I also pray that you start sleeping well soon, very, very soon.
Love you,
Mommy
No comments:
Post a Comment